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Safety Advice

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How to keep you and your family safe from domestic abuse

The best way to protect yourself and your family is by being mindful of your safety at all times. This section includes tips on staying alert to the dangers of domestic abuse as well as how to talk to children about keeping safe. You’ll also find a list of useful apps and services that help you to record incidents of domestic abuse and find safe spaces nearby.

You can call our 24-hour advice line on 01204 365677 for support.

Remember, if you are in immediate danger, call 999. If you can’t talk, stay silent and press 55 on your keypad. Tap your phone or cough. This will alert the emergency services that you need urgent help.

Staying safe in an abusive relationship

Follow these steps to stay alert and plan how you might respond to any abuse before it happens.

  1. Identify safe areas in your home. These are ground floor rooms with an exit where there are no hard surfaces, sharp objects or potential weapons – places you can move to if you suspect an attack is imminent. Avoid the bathroom, kitchen and garage.
  2. Keep your mobile phone on you. Make sure your mobile phone is fully charged and on you at all times. If you suspect your partner is accessing your phone or has installed a tracking app on it, think how this may change the way you get help. Turn off the ‘track my phone’ function so you cannot be followed. Make sure you have enough phone credit to call for help in an emergency.
  3. Plan to spend time out of the house
    Walk the dog, exercise or go shopping to get out of the house and speak to a friend or a professional about what’s happening at home.
  4. Be aware of the risks of alcohol
    Alcohol can make your abuser unpredictable, leaving you more vulnerable to abuse and less able to keep you and your children safe. If possible, do not drink alongside the abuser.
  5. Keep in contact
    Arrange a regular call or meeting with a friend or neighbour to let them know you are ok. Memorise or keep important contact details handy to use if you need to.
  6. Tell a neighbour you trust
    They can look out for you and call for help if they hear an incident taking place.
  7. Pack a bag and keep money handy
    Keep a bag of essential items (ID, medication) and money in a safe place or with a friend or neighbour in case you need to escape quickly.
  8. Talk to your GP
    If you have a Bolton GP, ring them and ask about the IRIS team. They will recognise you are experiencing domestic abuse and refer you to Fortalice for specialist support.

Keeping children safe from domestic abuse

  1. Talk about what’s happening and how to keep safe
    Tell your children not to get involved in a domestic incident, even if they want to help. Share advice on what to do if an incident breaks out, like go to a safe place, stay close to a phone and exit, and keep away from places they could be trapped or where knives and weapons are stored.
  2. Teach them to call 999 in an emergency
    Explain what they need to do and say to get help quickly, such as their full name, address and telephone number. Tell them to go somewhere safe to make the call and to never do this in front of the abuser.
  3. Rehearse an escape plan
    Think about using a code word, sign or gesture to tell the children to leave. Make an escape plan to help you and your children get away safely in an emergency.

Useful resources

Ask for ANI at the pharmacy

Ask for ANI is a codeword scheme introduced by the UK Government to enable domestic abuse victims to get help. ANI stands for ‘Action Needed Immediately’. You can ask for ANI at any UK pharmacy to alert staff that you need urgent help.

Clare’s Law

Under UK law, anyone has the right to ask the police if they believe that they, or someone they know, is in a relationship with someone that could be abusive towards them. Clare’s Law (also known as the domestic violence disclosure scheme), allows you to find out whether your partner has a history of violence, abuse or assault. To apply for disclosure under Clare’s Law, contact your local police force.

Safe Places

Safe Places  is a national network of local venues where you can go to feel safe and ask for help. If you are being followed or feel anxious or in danger while out and about, search the website or the free Safe Places app to find the nearest safe place within a 15-minute walk of your location.

Smartphone Apps

Only use if safe to do so and you are sure your phone is not being checked or monitored.

Hollie Guard turns your phone into a personal safety device. Use it to record incidents, alert emergency contacts and share your location with them.

Bright Sky provides information and advice for people in abusive relationships, or those concerned about someone they know. The app is available to use in Polish, Punjabi and Urdu.

Register for emergency SMS by texting the word register to 999. Follow the instructions to confirm. Use this service to send an emergency text if you feel unsafe and unable to call 999.